3 reasons why I'm moving back to San Francisco
And why it'll fuel my next phase of exponential growth
Just last week, I showed up to a pilates studio for my 6:30AM workout, only to find the studio closed without any explanation. It was pitch dark—and the only soul around was a stranger on a bicycle. Upon seeing my confusion, he took it as permission to harass me, and it took me about 10 minutes to find a way out. I’m safe, I’m lucky, I’m okay.
There are sadly many reasons for me to not want to live in SF. I have experienced more unsafe experiences in the last two months of being here than I have in the last several years.
Yet as of today, I officially have a signed lease.
Because every cell in my body knows I need to be in San Francisco.
This is the same feeling I felt three years ago when I decided to move across the country to Miami when no one, including my husband, understood why we’d ever leave California.
I can’t fully express the evolution that came from this move but I’ll try—both my husband and I finally got into the best health of our lives yet, completely changed our trajectories, and found more happiness than we knew could exist.
Yet when I started getting pings, or intuitive nudges, a few months ago to get my ass to SF, I felt… unsure.
I’ve learned by now to not question these nudges too much—they have never led me astray—but the thought of leaving Miami after experiencing such immense safety and joy felt unsettling.
But I packed my bags and moved across the country anyway. Three months later, I have a lot more clarity and here’s how I know SF is going to fuel my next phase of exponential growth:
The thought of leaving SF creates physical pain in my body (this is the biggest qualifier for me — more on this below)
SF is demanding I raise the standards I have for myself
I’m not alone or lonely
Reason 1: My body hurts at the thought of leaving SF
Two years ago, I started working with my performance coach, Tim Adams. His coaching entails 3-4 hours on a table doing intense bodywork (myofascial release) while confronting buried emotions/narratives and trauma (see The Body Keeps the Score).
These sessions have helped me develop a strong mind/body/spirit connection, one where I can immediately get feedback on a thought or action I’m engaging in based on how my body reacts. I’ve learned what pains in different parts of my body might signal. Most importantly, I’ve learned the existence of pain is a signal itself that I need to bring my awareness inwards—that there’s a lesson waiting to be uncovered.
When I first got to SF in August, everything felt so noisy. I was barely sleeping, and the vibes just felt off. I got nervous that SF would be more distracting than productive.
But every time I discounted staying in SF, I would feel insane resistance in my body. Tightness in my chest, burning in my shoulders—all the ways I’ve learned my body communicates when I’m going down a thinking/talk path that isn’t in flow.
When I feel these pains, I try to immediately shift into a different mindset. Usually scarcity to abundance. Pessimism to optimism. Worry to belief. Seriousness to play. I bring my focus to the part of my body that hurts. I take a pause and feel into what’s there for me. I keep listening until the clarity comes. It almost always takes just a few minutes, if not seconds.
This has been such a valuable tool in my arsenal—SF has brought me some of the most critical and rewarding lessons that I don’t believe could have been learned anywhere else. These lessons are already triggering a growth that’s faster and more intense than anything I’ve experienced yet.
I’m grateful that my body is speaking so damn loudly and clearly. And I’m so proud that I’m able to hear it so well, especially after decades of being numb to it.
I’ve been training for this.
Reason 2: I’m being forced to raise my standards for myself
Three of the highest standards I have for myself are for self-improvement, self-belief, and value-creation. All must be relentless. SF is making sure of that.
Everyone here is pushing. And pulling. And building. And wanting to create value. It doesn’t matter what they’ve already done or not done—people are out here wanting to make it happen, not just dreaming dreams but actively tinkering and failing and trying again and succeeding.
It’s contagious. When you see people of all kinds making it happen, it’s hard to ever doubt yourself. If they can do it, so can I. If I can do it, so can they.
SF definitely makes one thing clear: there’s A LOT to do. There’s no time to doubt yourself—just do the thing. Raise the bar you have for yourself, and make it happen.
Reason 3: I’m not alone or lonely
I found myself feeling so lonely the first couple of weeks I was here, until I realized that was just old programming creeping in.
Yes, it took a while to find my people that I really vibe with, but last week I realized something.
The majority of people here are my kind of people. We’ve all been attracted to this insane city for similar reasons—to bet on our dreams, to be a part of something cool, to surround ourselves with brilliance, to actualize the version of ourselves we know is within us.
That resonance is palpable. It’s magical. And in all my travels, I still haven’t found anything that comes close.
Miami made me fall in love with remote working. Plenty of space, gorgeous views, amazing time zone, creative freedom.
SF is making me fall back in love with in-person working. Resonance, co-creation, boundless energy.
I miss Miami every day. I am grateful for the space she provided, the work she allowed me to do, the foundation she helped me build. She gave me everything I needed to come back to SF and thrive.
This welcome mat from this morning’s workout class wraps up my feelings for SF perfectly:
I’m here! If you’re around, let me know <3
Love,
Shireen